We grow great by dreams. All big men are dreamers. They see things in the soft haze of a spring day or in the red fire of a long winter’s evening. Some of us let these great dreams die, but others nourish and protect them; nurse them through bad days till they bring them to the sunshine and light which comes always to those who sincerely hope that their dreams will come true.
~ Woodrow Wilson
Mister and I are in the process of reassessing our youngest child life journey. We have been part-time empty nesters for two years. OUr youngest child was kicked out of West Point - The U.S. Military Academy. Talk about a rude awakening and a reality check. Some of you know my reaction first hand in the virtual world. Yeah ole gurl rantings are not sugar coated.
Fast forward……what do you say to a adult child that returns home?
You do not pick up from when they graduated from high school. Hell to the naw. I am a firm believer if a child is fucking. Ummm…then you keep it 300%. What we not gonna do is pretend and put the young adult in a regressive state. NOPE.
Nobody….naw man child does not sling dick nor pounce around this castle slinging dick harder than my Mister. I don’t think so. NAW. MUTE conversation. If I am dat bitch to the friends and familys….guess what add a middle name and just call me “Bitching Boobie”.
Now we have a adult heart to heart discussion. A real one that does not sugar coat shit in our abode. We have a therapeutic experience.
In a two year period the child have endured experiences, had folks influence, blame game and all that asinine shit that do not amount to much of nothing. At the end of the day. The fact remains. This is our home. Nothing or no one will disrupt it nor change our perspective.
Please note.: Dee does not n nor do I give a shit about anyone opinion except at the bank, medical doctor and the foundation in which we wear our hat on. Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one. It has been quite the ride over the pass two years. That is another blog post.
Trust n believe this rant. I learned from the freaking best. Old school doll living in a 21st century world. Thank you family n ancestors. Teach them in which the way you want them to go….and they will not stray from it.
What is not going to happen when the adult returns back to the nest.
- There will be no tolerance of disrespect in our household or personal space.
- We are making the rules up as we go….no one prepared us for a adult child living at home. There is not a manual to refer too…K.
- The young adult is no longer a high school student.
- The adult child must set achievable goals and be serious about obtaining them.
- Outsider opinions and ranting do not count otherwise go live with them n let them handle your stuff.3
- While attending college. A GPA of 3.0+ must be maintain. Please do not put us in a position to call our bluff.
- Note there is a difference between moving out and getting kicked out of the family residence.
- Our home is not the resident hotel for sexual escapades, partying or any that asinine shit that fucked up kids believe their parents are suppose to endure while you find yourself. Not one our watch.
- No babies will be raised as our children. We will become grandparents and the adult child is officially going to find out what it means to take care of a human being.
- Adult children using others and their family as a escape goat is unacceptable behavior under our roof. Be accountable for your mistakes and own it….move on and complete your goals. DREAM BIG BABY.
- Adult children giving their parents the side eye because they’re inquiring about the “FUCKUP” does not allow stank face. That would be cause for immediate dismissal from the resident especially from a Momma entering menopause. GOT IT!
- Adult children do not get to use siblings, family members, friends from high school or acquaintances to fix their fucked up shit. Time to grow up. This is no longer high school. Slow you blow. What the parents were willing to do during high school no longer applies to the next stage of development.
- Did I mention.: We are making the rules up as we go? YURP….sure is. You already know what it tis. Let not play pretend. Momma does not do well with that and Mother got a “F” in dat class.
- Whatever….we would have loved two military officers but guess what “GOD” does not make mistakes. Carry on son….no more shit better come down the pipe otherwise eat grass. Like I said. This is not a freaking competition between two young men. You two young men are not alike…you both have unique qualities and personalities. Let God use you both for the greater good of humanity. That is all I will say about that…K.
- What does the young adult have to offer to the person they’re dating? A man should be able to handle his business. If all a man has to offer you is a wet ass. You’re friends. Focus….get your priorities in order. Ain’t nobody got time for dat.
- I’ve been called a bitch by my child. Ummmmm….you have no ideal son(s). HA. Handle your business…cause if momma has to clean up any mess. Ole gurl scrubbing floors and I am not wiping dirty assclown behinds. YOU HEARD…UMPH!
- NOT…NOPE. Our home is not a hotel. If your not in a committed relationship…ummm our residence is not a hotel. DO I NEED TO REPEAT MYSELF?
- I am a character….oh really? You have no ideal! I am just say that and leave it at that. I am the “QUEEN” of the “KING” castle. NOT ONE SOUL will enter the castle and disrupt it. I can do that all by myself. Learn how to play Chess. You might learn something.
- Wear condoms. Ain’t nobody got time for all that immature and I just want to feel wetness bullshit.
- Adult children before they have sexual relations must make sure they are affiliated with their partners pass health records, HIV testing and birth control. I have no tolerance for ignorance and we taught the adult children when they were kids the meaning of sexuality. Momma Dee did not sugar coat nor taught from a naive place.
- Homosexuality – Do you boo. You know where I stand. You know Daddy position. Imma leave it at that.
Please note my bluff was called one time. Folks came at me from the left with some bullshit that I was clueless about…UMPH. Really….next stage of development. Mister and I have spewed about our backgrounds to our sons and how my parents and biological family raised us. I can only blog about our humble beginnings and upbringing. I took role as a step parent and Daddy took his head of the house and caring as primary custodian of our sons serious. In another words….momma and “DADDY” don’t take no shit. I got daddy my “KING” of our castle very serious. My stance is firm. I don’t give shit who does not like it. Momma Dee is no longer fluff…talk to pops…big daddy is teaching momma how to keep it on ice. Thank you Mister…..MUAH!
Ask yourself when judging.: If you had children. Who would you leave your children care in when you’re not present. How responsible are you as a adult? What type of head of the house are you? What exactly do you expect when the parents set a path for success is not taken serious?
That is my bantering rant about this…K. Whatever the will of God for both of our sons. That is what it shall be. Henceforth though, no nonsense allowed. Never was….I don’t give a shit about what anyone thinks either of my stance. I can’t speak for Mister. One thing is for certain though…no one and nothing gets to distract, disrupt and bring asinine shit to my “KING” door. Got it? Checkmate.
Dealing with adult children living in the abode can take a serious toll on wary parents. I believe parents put up with a lot of bullshit from today’s entitlement generation. NOT…I was not raised that way. I don’t care…there has to be a balance of respect within the household. Parents are overextended, taxed and trying to stay abreast.
What parents do not need is a adult child coming with some asinine bullshit that disrupts the course of everyday life.
I already know my peeps have a problem with me blogging and putting ish on front street. Please note: I don’t give a damn.
At the end of the day…folks are not going to hold you up. Matter of fact..outsiders will spit you out and leave you on the street. Better check that asinine shit at the door.
Get your priorities in check. Oh seriously….
Lesson learned from this journey.: What the parent think is best for the child is not always the outcome. Onto the next one…..henceforth we all have dreams and parents have lives too. Don’t forget that adult children. Parents do not get lose in lives of the children.
I am not trying to be liked nor loved by our son’s friends. NOPE….I don’t give a damn. Call me Coach Bitch….Momma Dee ain’t the damn one…K.
Tell you one thing is for certain…thank you lord. I am happy that boy of ours is attempting to find his way back. My damn eyes hurt and I ain’t got money for plastic surgery n some eye wrinkle cremes do not work.
We missed one of our brats, YURP. YURP….YUP!!! Outsiders before you put your nose in our “family” shit.
Note this you can’t the creation that this Queen n King created behind closed doors. Check your nosy ass at the door biddy n mofos. HA….